Lucille Iacovelli ~ Cape Cod

~ Raining Violets ~

2010-04-30T23:00:00.012-04:00

When April comes around, my landlord's yard turns into a sea of violets. Because the lawn is chemical free, these lovely little plants with their delicate leaves and deep indigo blossoms cover the ground like a magic carpet.

This beautiful sight never fails to awaken my foraging instinct. Last year, I spent days picking the blossoms to make candied violets. This year, I resurrected a recipe for violet jelly from an ancient herbalist handbook and transformed my violet harvest into four jars of shimmering amethyst sweetness. Using a double measure of violet petals made the infusion extra fragrant with a deep violet color. This recipe calls for the petals only which must be plucked by hand from each blossom. The last flower denuded of its petals found my fingers stained purple with the abundant pigment these blossoms hold.

The color was so lovely, I decided to experiment with a cookie recipe, incorporating the infusion into the dough and pressing the petals into the tops of the cookies. The results were gratifying. The violet flavor was subtle, but distinctly floral, and combined nicely with the fine texture of this particular cookie. I brought some to my favorite taste testers, the librarians at Sandwich Library, for their critique .

Today, while picking up some audio books I had requested, Rebbecca returned the plate in which I delivered the Violet cookies last Saturday. I asked if she liked them, but she hadn't tasted them. Saturday was her day off. She said they were a big hit and disappeared fast. Upon returning home, I gathered more violets to make another batch of cookies for the lovely librarians who didn't get to taste them last week... anything for an excuse to gather flowers and bake.

Cocker Cookies

2010-02-20T13:25:00.000-05:00

Just before Valentine's Day, CSRNE was selling chocolate Cocker Spaniels (the edible kind) to raise funds for the wonderful work they do in rescuing abandoned cocker spaniels. The chocolate cocker candy inspired me to make some special Valentine's Day treats in honor of Riley's 5 month anniversary as my companion.

Giant Cocker Cookies

They turned out just OK in appearance, but really delicious. Using an old fashioned gingerbread cookie recipe my mother had cut out of a newspaper over 50 years ago, I rolled the dough out on the thick side and cut three cocker shapes out to form cookies which measured about 12" x 14".

These were covered in a thick layer of icing made from confectionery sugar, Dutch-Process & Black Cocoa, thinned to the right consistency with some melted Dark Chocolate, browned butter and Cream Sherry. I then added a pinch each of cinnamon, clove, ginger, nutmeg, salt and cayenne pepper. The addition of these spices to chocolate concoctions always prompts people to ask what kind of cocoa I use. This is an old Italian "secret ingredient" my grandmother and mother used when making chocolate icing for Italian Chocolate Cookies.

The chocolate and gingerbread combination was a big hit with Riley's groomer, who received one for Valentine's Day...from Riley, of course.

Life's Little Paws ~ Happy Endings 2009

2010-01-22T20:48:00.014-05:00

Life’s Little Paws is an ALL volunteer cocker spaniel rescue group. These people are true life savers for abandoned cockers, especially those with visual impairments . Please visit their website and make a donation if you can.

My heartfelt thanks to Megan and Life's Little Paws
for bringing Riley into my life.

How fortunate I am to have this precious old lady! Her sight is compromised and she requires eye drops a few times a day. She won my heart the moment we met.

My Mushroom Mascot

2009-10-31T10:30:00.003-04:00

The death of my beloved Sierra left a hollow space in my heart. For me, life without a canine companion is empty. Fortunately, my landlord's dog, Sheamus, was more than pleased to fill the void with his delightful company. Every time I took him along for a ride through the state forest, I would spot some good edible mushrooms from the road. For blessing me with "mushroom luck", Seamus became my "Mushroom Mascot".

Sniff...sniff.. This one will do nicely in an omelet.

Sheamus meets wild turkeys.
An intense moment... stand-off between dog and bird. The energy of this meeting was electric! Always the perfect little gentledog, Sheamus checked his instinct to chase. The turkeys, too, kept their distance, but interest was high on both sides. As Sheamus inched closer, the turkeys grew wary, strutting off into the woods.

Heading home... with a basket full of honeys and bluets.

Honey Mushrooms
I picked pounds of honeys nearly every day for weeks. No need to walk through the woods to spot these. They were so prolific, you couldn't miss them from the road running through the state forest. I've never seen (or gathered) so many honeys in this area before.

A small hen-of-the-woods...
One day's growth fit nicely in the palm of my hand. I could have left this another few days to grow larger, but it was so perfectly fresh, I decided to cut it while it was still undiscovered by insects.

The last and largest of 2009.
The season's last hen weighed in at 8 lbs... not very large compared to those many foragers find in other areas, but it was in perfect condition and 8 lbs. is a lot of mushroom to clean, and enough to make mushroom lasagna, mushroom pizza, mushroom strata, all shared with the Forest Rangers at Shawme-Crowell who are my favorite "taste testers" and always willing to sample my mushroom concoctions.

Mushroom eye candy.
Top: Pink Fruiting Lichen -Bottom: Turkey Tails & Lichen growing on a stump.

Oyster Mushrooms

2009-08-24T17:51:00.012-04:00

Sheamus brought me mushroom luck yesterday. On our ride from the Sandwich Transfer Station (aka the town dump) into Sandwich Village, I caught sight of this tree in my peripheral vision adorned with clusters of oyster mushrooms!

Most of them were prime specimens... not yet invaded by insect infestation. With a special tool stored in my trunk for such finds, I filled my basket with these delectable fungi. The "special tool" is a telescoping poll fitted with a small wire basket, used to fish golf balls out of the drink. It's perfect for dislodging mushrooms found growing at lofty heights.

The best way to use the wild oyster mushrooms, especially the larger specimens, is to boil them for 10 minutes until they lose their fragile texture. Then the skin is removed and they can be frozen to use in recipes or simply sauteed with butter and garlic. These oyster mushrooms make the most delicious cream of mushroom soup.

I was so pleased to spot this wealth of fungi on the roadside, as I am no longer able to walk in the woods to forage properly. I think Sheamus brought me luck!

Dog for a Day

2009-08-24T17:08:00.025-04:00

Meet Sheamus... My Dog for a Day

Since losing my beloved Sierra in May, my life has been devoid of love and warmth. I thought about adopting another elderly cocker spaniel, but hesitate because my health is poor. Adoption is a serious commitment.

Fortunately for me, my landlord has a lovely little well -behaved male Westie who just LOVES riding in the car! Sheamus has become my "Dog for a Day". Whenever I feel up to having him visit or keep me company when I run errands, Sheamus jumps at the opportunity to venture out with his Auntie Lu.

Sheamus is an intelligent little boy.. a real pleasure. He sits in the front seat (something I could not allow Sierra to do as it was impossible to keep her off my lap while driving, so she sat in back like a little queen.)

Dogs are sensitive to human frailty and disability. Sheamus knows instinctively that I do not have the strength to hold him if should he exert his considerable strength and pull me around at the end of his leash. He is the perfect little gentleman and brings joy to my life.

Although he cannot replace the emptiness in my heart that a canine companion of my own can fill, his presence is a gift which only a gentle, loving dog can give.

Sheamus & I enjoy an outing at Shawme-Crowell State Forest

A Good Father of the Feathered Kind

2009-06-23T20:44:00.013-04:00

A bright sight on this gray and rainy day... A male cardinal feeding his young offspring. This male is caring for two males and one female. Parents continue to feed chicks for 25 to 56 days after they fledge from the nest.

The young bird flutters its wings in food-begging fashion...

This Cardinal continues to feed his young even after they have grown almost as large as he.

What could be more heart warming than this sight on a dreary day...just outside my door.

Our final hours together

2009-05-26T11:53:00.015-04:00

My loyal companion, Sierra and I are spending our final hours together. Tomorrow my kind, compassionate vet will come to euthanize her. Sierra developed a baseball-size hematoma on her upper back about 2 weeks ago, which did not appear ominous at first. The hematoma seemed to be confined below the skin and above the muscle. Dr. Beth Mosley (the most wonderful vet in the world) drained as much blood out of it as she could, put her on antibiotics and said to keep an eye on it. We returned a week later when the hematoma filled up again. It was aspirated again and blood work done, which revealed anemia and other abnormalities, but nothing very serious... just what you might see in an older dog. But by this time, Sierra's appetite had diminished. She was eating only a tiny bit of food, which is very unusual for her.

To make a long and heartbreaking story short, Sierra stopped eating, she is too weak to walk, the hematoma is larger and spreading and may be invasive internally. She does not appear to be in pain, but I do not want her to have to suffer before she leaves this world. For the second time, I am making the hardest decision I have ever made in my life...to euthanize my loving, loyal companion.. the only being with whom I share my life. There are no words to describe this loss.

We are fortunate to have a vet willing to make a house call for this heart wrenching good-bye, so Sierra will spend her final moments in her own familiar surroundings...

I adopted Sierra nearly five years ago... Now that I am losing her, that time seems all too brief. She rescued me from profound grief when I lost my beloved Keshia, a cocker spaniel who shared the joy of her life with me for over 19 years. Five years ago, on May 7 2004, Dr. Mosley made the same compassionate house call for Keshia. I thought my heart would never recover from that loss, but it did, thanks to Sierra. I adopted Sierra four months after I lost Keshia. She was 10 years old at the time..an older less likely to be adopted than her younger counterparts, which made me want her all the more. It took a few months to win her trust. She won my heart and we have been inseparable since.

My heart is breaking. Please pray for us. These final hours are very precious...the last I will share with this beautiful, gentle soul who has given me so much love and devotion. Dr. Mosley will come tomorrow after 5 PM, unless Sierra indicates she is in pain or suffering today. In that case, Dr. Mosley will come today after 5, but I hope we will have another day together.. while I watch her sleep and remain by her side.. doing whatever I can to assure her she is loved.

Update: May 29 - We postponed Sierra's exit until today. She left this world in the most peaceful, gentle way, while I stroked her with love and reassurance. I have witnessed this gentle passing twice.. and both times made me wonder why we do not provide the option of this peaceful, graceful exit for ourselves. We should all be so blessed to leave this life as gently as we allow our companion animals their final exit.

House Mouse - Our Daily Routine

2009-05-07T16:47:00.008-04:00

Mouse Freedom from Lucille on Vimeo.

The same mouse has been in this trap 3 times in the past week. I know it's him, because he has a white mark on his head :-)

This mouse thinks the trap is his feeding station :-) In a way, I suppose it is. The same mouse (I recognize him by a white marking on his head) has been in this trap at least 3 times in the past week. Last night I found him in there before I had a chance to bait it with peanut butter. We go through the same drill each time. I get to take a close look at him (he's adorable!) and he gets to eat his peanut butter and find his way back into my apartment.

Surprise visit

2009-04-16T16:41:00.012-04:00

She landed...

The birds which regularly visit my feeders are mostly small birds, with blue jays and mourning doves weighing in on the large side to finches and hummingbirds at the small end of the scale.

Occasionally, a crow or two will make an appearance, but not very often. Imagine my surprise when this turkey landed to check out what was on offer for dinner! Unfortunately, she found nothing to her liking. Cracked corn is now on my shopping list. Hopefully, she will honor me with another visit.

She investigated...

She flew off into the sunset.

Twenty-six Saris

2009-03-21T02:06:00.011-04:00

As I draped my first sari around my body, my hands moved as if they had performed this wrapping, folding and tucking every day for a lifetime. And perhaps they had, in some previous incarnation. The act of dressing in a sari always brings on an intense deja vu.

My twenty-six saris sit on a shelf in my closet, each beautiful in its own special way. Each chosen for some unique quality which appealed to my senses. When I purchased my last sari, I made a promise to myself that I would wear every one of them at least once before leaving this life.

I have worn nine of them. My hands have only to perform the ritual seventeen times more and my promise will be kept. Tomorrow I shall wear the sari with a procession of elegantly decorated elephants, trunks uplifted, promenading across the pallu.

The Final Time

2009-03-07T14:11:00.020-05:00

Today I am thinking of final times...and things that come to pass.

The final time I see the first robin of the year

The final time I wait for elderberry blossoms to fruit

The final time I gather the ripened berries and sit for hours, fingers deftly removing the stems

The final time I feed wild turkeys at the state forest

The final time I carry my folding chair onto Sandwich Town Beach

The final time I sit by the summer ocean

The final time I watch for the beach plums to ripen

The final time my arms are scratched bloody while plucking them from thorny branches

The final time I turn my wild bounty into beach plum and elderberry jam

The final time I satisfyingly line a shelf with row upon row of jelly jars, like sparkling gems of ruby and amethyst

The final time I take my dog for a 5 minute walk

The final time I forage for wild mushrooms

The final time I cook for enjoyment

The final time I see the glorious colors of Autumn leaves

The final time my nose gets dusted with pollen while smelling a Casablanca lily

The final time I pinch off sprigs of curly mint growing at the bottom of my stairs and breathe in its fragrance

The final time I plant a flower

I would have made these moments more sacred had I known I was doing them for a final time.
~~~

Things I have not been able to do for years and wish I had cherished more.. things which have passed out of my life - already done for the final time:

Looking up at the sky

Walking with my head held high, in perfect posture

Breathing without having to fight for it

Feeling my body totally relax

Smiling and laughing

Eating and drinking without having to do certain maneuvers to prevent choking

Taking my dog for a walk

Driving for pleasure

Having my teeth cleaned

Being able to do anything with ease

Working in a garden

Doing anything for pleasure

Enjoying, really enjoying life

Being free of physical pain and discomfort
~~~~

I will make very special moments of what remains within my ability to do
as if doing each one for the final time.

Attention Aminal Lovers!

2009-03-05T11:51:00.010-05:00

The Animal Rescue Site is having trouble getting enough people to click on it daily to meet their quota of getting free food donated every day to abused and neglected animals. It takes less than a minute (How about 20 seconds) to go to their site and click on the purple box 'fund food for animals' for free. This doesn't cost you a thing. Their corporate sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate food to abandoned/neglected animals in exchange for advertising. Here's the web site! Pass it along to people you know.
http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/
PLEASE CIRCULATE THIS LINK!

Opossum for Breakfast

2009-02-24T07:33:00.004-05:00

Morning Possum from Lucille on Vimeo.

Look at those marvelous ears! Her pink feet!

A magnificent creature, the opossum!

Winter Solstice

2009-02-14T02:49:00.005-05:00

Snow Song

2009-02-05T23:06:00.002-05:00

Snow Song from Lucille on Vimeo.

My friend Mary Anne, sent me a lovely floral basket for Christmas. It was full of fresh flowers and beautiful evergreens. It graced my apartment for weeks, and when the flowers died, the evergreens were still fresh, but starting to drop some leaves from being indoors.

I put the basket on my deck where my feathered friends congregate each day to dine. The birds love this basket, as this little wren seems to be singing in appreciation!

Finch Rescue - December 2005

2009-02-05T20:32:00.006-05:00

Finch Rescue - Dec. 19, 2005 - Sandwich, Massachusetts from Lucille on Vimeo.

Finch Rescue - Dec. 19, 2005 - Sandwich, Massachusetts

Baklava Made Easy

2009-01-11T11:16:00.007-05:00

Filmed in January 2004 - Dedicated to Cheryl Martin, who taught me how to make this delicious Armenian pastry.

The Squirrel-Proof Bird Feeder

2008-12-03T18:59:00.007-05:00

The Squirrel-Proof Bird Feeder from Lucille on Vimeo.

There's a feisty squirrel in every yard! This one managed to coax a few seeds out of this feeder, but it did prevent his feasting on its entire contents in a single day, as he did with the feeder below, which he treated as his own private feeding station.

I still use this feeder, but it is now filled with safflower seeds, which the birds like, but squirrels do not.

Thanksgiving Dinner - Hens & Chickens, No Turkey, please!

2008-11-25T17:34:00.008-05:00

My idea of Thanksgiving dinner, courtesy of wild bounty foraged from Shawme-Crowell State Forest - Sandwich, Massachusetts.

Vegetarian Thanksgiving - Hens & Chickens, but No Turkey, please! from Lucille Iacovelli on Vimeo.

Oyster Mushrooms Growing Wild

2008-11-01T12:42:00.006-04:00

I found a tree stump covered with oyster mushrooms weighing about 10 lb. After cleaning, I photographed them before subjecting them to the frying pan and freezer. They are infinitely fascinating.
The detail photos were taken with the fungi placed on a light box used for reading x-rays. The vivid colors were obtained with photo editing software.

What's in the cauldron?

2008-10-31T13:23:00.005-04:00

See what the witch is brewing

Escape ~ David Sedaris & Pumpkin-Date Bread

2008-10-31T12:11:00.016-04:00

Physical limitations narrow one's means of escaping the nastier realities of life. Two of my most effective methods these days are cooking and listening to audio books. I love David Sedaris and have listened to his audio books often enough to recite many of his pieces right along with his narration. His latest work "When You Are Engulfed in Flames" was even better the second time around.

My oven is preheating, my mixing bowls and ingredients for pumpkin-date bread are on the kitchen counter, the volume turned up on David Sedaris. I am escaping today.

Listen to David Sedaris on NPR

Diwali Sweets

2008-10-26T22:20:00.015-04:00

While baking Christmas cookies last year, I wanted to send something special to a friend from India. I had been collecting decorative tins for months, picking them up at tag sales and thrift shops especially for packing my sweets. I found a lovely peacock tin from Harrod's. I forget what sort of sweets it held originally, but put this aside to hold the cookies I would make for my Indian friend.

One of my favorite holiday sweets is the 7 Layer Italian Cookie, which takes its name from the colors of the Italian flag. Improvising on the colors, I called my sweets 'Flags of India'. I promised myself I would make these for Diwali in 2008.

Diwali, traditionally known by its Sanskrit name Deepavali, is a major Indian festival celebrated by Hindus, Jains and Sikhs across the globe as the "Festival of Lights," where the lights or lamps signify victory of good over the evil within every human being

This five-day festival is celebrated on the first day of the lunar Kartika month, which comes in the month of October or November. There are numerous myths about its origin. Hindus believe Diwali marks the homecoming of King Rama, who returned after defeating the evil Ravana in a battle that lasted for 14 years. Some recognize it as the day the goddess Lakshmi was rescued from an evil king. Yet others believe it to be the day Lord Krishna destroyed a despised demon.
All agree that it symbolizes the triumph of good over evil. In marking the Hindu New Year, it signifies Happiness, Good Health and Prosperity. It is a celebration of joy, where gifts are exchanges and festival foods are enjoyed... especially sweets!

I had hoped to bake the Flags of India today for Diwali which falls on October 28 this year. Unfortunately, despite my best effort, I could not muster the physical strength or energy for the task. Hopefully, tomorrow will grace me with advance Diwali blessings and energy sufficient to transform the ingredients within my kitchen into some delectable treats to share with friends.

Brightest Diwali Blessings!

Struck my funny bone!

2008-10-22T21:02:00.028-04:00

Birthday greeting from my dear friend:

The pen bit .... priceless! I could just see (and hear) Dianne as the first pen ran dry and she searched for another while Tigger and Sasha meow " Purrr Mommy", swish their tails and turn up their noses at the 10th kind of gourmet/prescription cat food she's tried to entice them with that day. I don't want more birthdays... I would much rather reincarnate ASAP and return as one of Dainne's beloved cats!

Another delightful birthday surprise...

A magnificent Birthday Bouquet from my dear friend Mary Anne, Detail of some individual blossoms- Beauty within beauty, reflecting itself again and again...

Having all the ingredients on hand, I baked a birthday cake, winging it as I went along, as is usual when I am in experimental baking mode. Peter, a ranger at Shawme-Crowell State Forest, (where all my favorite mushrooms grow) would celebrate his birthday on the 19th, the day after mine, so I baked this cake with him in mind. I should have measured and written down the ingredients, because this gingerbread-pumpkin-cocoa pound cake studded with walnuts, dried cranberries, dark chocolate chips and preserved ginger turned out to be one of my best experimental creations. Frosted with a thin glaze of dutch & black cocoa, confection sugar, a pinch each of cinnamon, nutmeg, clove, ginger, allspice and thinned down with Marsala and a drop of orange oil...the deep, dark flavor perfectly compliments the not-too-sweet gingerbread richly textured with the addition of the pumpkin. It's a very October cake.. a Libra cake. My decorating skills are a bit rusty, but passable. (Those are supposed to be mushrooms at the bottom of the cake, as Peter christened me "The Mushroom Lady" when I first began foraging at Shawme-Crowell.)

Sunday afternoon just before the 4 PM "changing of the guards", I headed over to the State Forest. As I drove through the entrance and immediately noticed the little station was empty and not a vehicle in sight, I realized my mistake. After October 16, rangers are there only certain days and hours, as this is the start of the off-season.

The cake is in my freezer now. I left a message at the ranger station, but if I don't hear from them by next week, the cake will end up as coffee break fare for the folks at the Sandwich Library.

Update: Peter did get his cake!

My Nocturnal Visitor

2008-10-21T04:07:00.010-04:00

The little deck just just outside my kitchen door has been a favorite dining spot of local fauna since I have lived in this flat and began
feeding the birds. Birds flit in and out from dawn to dusk. Squirrels and chipmunks come right up to the door, demanding more seeds, more peanuts.. all day long. Wild turkeys have come to feed in the yard below for the first time this year.

Occasionally, a stray or neighbors' pet cats will stealthily climb the stairs, attracted by the busy avian traffic. The felines, though rarely make a return visit, as my dog has "cat radar" and barks nonstop at the hint of a meow. My visitors have become so accustomed to my presence that they no longer scamper or fly away when I cross the threshold from my space to theirs. There is something wondrous about wild creatures accepting you as a natural part of their existence.. They bestow a benediction and bless my life with beauty, grace and joyful antics.

After nightfall, the raccoons wreak havoc out there...clumsily tipping over flower pots and rooting around in the plants for leftovers the daytime diners have overlooked. For a while, I replenished the seeds and peanuts just after dark especially for these hungry critters until they became overly rambunctious, drawing attention from neighbors who take a different view of my visitors than I, considering them "pests". Sadly, they prefer television to the real life drama put on by Mother Nature just outside their window.

Recently, a new nocturnal visitor came upon the scene. Late one night my dog began pacing back and forth by the door, beckoning me to take a look. I turned on the dim outdoor light and there was an opossum! He froze as still as a statue the moment he found himself in the spotlight. I had rudely interrupted his sunflower seed snack. I stepped outside and expected him to scurry away. Instead, he remained completely still. Even his eyes were fixed as if hypnotized. As I inched closer and closer, he remained in place.

Finally, when I stood about 2 feet away with the camera held bit closer, he moved his head slightly as his eyes darted from side to side as if contemplating flight. He remained still long enough for me to get a good look at him, and he was a lovely creature! His face was beautiful.. especially his eyes. Feeling guilty about disturbing his meal, I took my pictures and retreated back into my flat, turning off the light. After a minute, he resumed his munching. I will never forget the sight of those dark and beautiful eyes, his delicately featured face, his little pink nose and feet..his white-tipped ears... and his tail! I waited for his return the following evening, but he has not been back..not that I am aware. Who knows how many enchanting creatures visit unobserved?

~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~

I am grateful, though, that this opossum found something worth his venture up my stairs for a midnight snack!

Then and Now

2008-09-02T10:25:00.013-04:00

Last week while a dear friend was driving me on my record third trip off Cape Cod since 2004, she mentioned finding this blog and said she couldn't believe its content. She was frankly confused. How was I able to go mushroom hunting, or even sit at my computer to write so much, for that matter? As the photographer who documented changes brought about by my cosmetic surgery for over a decade, she is one of the three people with a realistic idea of my daily existence. I told her to look at the dates on the entries... the original dates on each piece; not the date the entries were posted. Nearly everything I wrote about which involved physical activity (even minimal driving, walking, photography,) actually took place last year, when I was still able to wring the occasional "physically functional" day out of my damaged body through sheer will power.

My friend's voice broke with emotion when she said "I remember all the things you used to love doing. That is what angers me most about the way these doctors destroyed your life and left you to suffer and die in silence." We were in her car during this talk, and as usual, my head was bent down, the only position in which I am able to breathe without use of "external support" (a bamboo back scratcher pressed under my chin and jaw with a constant 2 lbs of upward pressure). The emotion in her voice made me lift my head to look at her and that is when I saw the tears on her cheek.. her face was flushed red and her expression was at once sad and angry. I reminded her that I have been anything but silent these ten years.

She agreed, I had made some waves in warning the public about the dangers of cosmetic surgery and that was something, but it certainly hasn't done me any good. I agreed this is true and reminded her that my outspokenness in this regard is most likely the very reason I have been left to suffer without help from the very surgical specialty responsible for destroying my health.

I have tried as much as possible to separate the aspect of my life I present on this blog from the devastating, life robbing experience brought about by my cosmetic surgery. In a very real sense, what you see here is.. or more accurately, was- a small fraction left in my life that had not been totally destroyed by my plastic surgery disaster, physical injury caused by the negligence, arrogance and duplicity of a medical "specialty" in need of a category all its own... one that subjects normal, healthy people to unnecessary operations.

Today there is nothing left but suffering and disability. In relating what I was still able to do even one year ago, I remind myself that I did actually live life once upon a time... a past reality so remote from my present existence that the experiences of my own life "before" might as well be those of a stranger.

Fragrant Fungi

2008-09-01T12:58:00.002-04:00

September 15, 2007

The Black Trumpet is often ignored by foragers in my neck of the woods. It is easy to overlook these incredibly fragrant fungi because here on Cape Cod, they rarely grow large enough to make them worth hunting. They are difficult to spot on the forest floor because their appearance so closely resembles brown, fallen leaves. This very thin and fragile fungi only last one or two days at most before they shrivel up into hard, coal black pieces of debris.

What these delicate mushrooms lack in size and substance, they make up for in flavor. Their unique characteristics make them easy to differentiate from poisonous types. I rarely find many of these in a season... perhaps enough to grace an omelet at best. The Black Trumpet has an affinity for egg dishes, transforming a simple omelet or a few scrambled eggs into special dish with an unforgettable flavor and aroma.

I could hardly believe my eyes when I spotted these tiny trumpets emerging from a large patch of moss growing along the roadside within the state forest. I stopped the car to take a closer look, and found enough trumpets to keep me on my knees in the moss until the area was picked clean. Wild fungi should be gathered with care. They should be cut flush with the ground with a knife rather than pulled out of the ground. This causes the least disturbance to the mycelium in the soil. Only pull when you absolutely must make a positive identification by a unique characteristic of the stem base. Proper gathering will increase the chance of finding the same mushrooms in that area year after year.

A House In The Woods: Catching Some Rays

2008-08-09T10:46:00.000-04:00

A House In The Woods: Catching Some Rays

Visitors' Return

2008-07-24T23:46:00.002-04:00

Lucille Iacovelli

With the warm weather my wild visitors return. Right now, the furry variety seems to have overpowered my feathered friends. In an attempt to divert the squirrels from devouring seed intended for the birds, I thought I would entice them away from the bird feeder with tiny crackers spread with peanut butter. I offered this in addition to their usual ration of cracked corn.

My plan backfired. Now they have increased in both number and appetite with a newly acquired taste for peanut butter...and so spoiled as to leave the cracker behind after licking off every molecule of peanut from its surface. I will allow them their peanut butter feast until the jar is empty. After that, they will have to eat the corn or find another human willing to indulge their extravagant taste!

My Special Visitor - Part II

2008-07-24T23:35:00.001-04:00

August 15, 2007

Gray Squirrel, and his girlfriend, Redhead, turn up every day. As they methodically munch their way through morsels of peanut butter laced corn meal, meticulously lick their nimble little paws clean, and end this repast with a long drink of water, I sit sipping tea, a few feet away, taking in the spectacle.
More often than not, I find myself confined to home, with ever more time to become better acquainted with my animal friends. This piece of glass which allows me the privilege of watching these charming creatures has become monumentally important in my life.

I have learned some of the ways in which physical limitations raise one's tolerance for the inevitable dust and detritus of life and from necessity, have let go of my former compulsion to keep my apartment as scrupulously clean as I would like. It is still clean, but not obsessively so. I was bothered by the fact that I could not keep the glass door crystal clear, as extending my neck for the job of cleaning is nearly impossible. Yet my longing for a perfect view of my visitors' antics impelled me to action. So, dragging a chair out to the deck, and teetering atop it's seat, I polished my window onto wonderland until it sparkled. .

Continued...

A Gift from Mumbai

2008-07-21T10:52:00.001-04:00

Dec. 29, 2007 Lucille Iacovelli

November left in its wake the bitter aftermath of yet another frustrating medical "encounter". After nearly 10 years of dealing with doctors more proficient in duplicity and prevarication than healing, I should not be shocked or angered when they continue on this path. Yet some small part of me always clings to the hope of an impossible miracle... that one of these highly educated and skilled physicians will develop a conscience; allowing them to break the destructive rules by which they sacrifice patients' well being to protect their negligent brethren. It will never happen in my lifetime, but when things get particularly difficult for me, I take some solace in knowing that my voice has focused attention on the conspiracy of silence in the medical profession, and in regard to iatrogenic injury caused by cosmetic surgery in particular.

Still, the advent of Christmas was not something I looked forward to with any degree of pleasant anticipation. December began with increased physical challenges, and the holidays would once again come and go, not in celebration with friends and family, but quietly uneventful, in the company of my loyal cocker spaniel companion. I was feeling rather despondent when I found a notice in my mailbox that a package was waiting for me at the post office. I was not expecting anything and could not think what it might be. I managed to drive the few miles to the post office, barely making it to the counter to sign for the parcel.

I was surprised and a bit confused when I was handed a package which carried the return address of my favorite sari walla in India. It had been several months since I last purchased a sari, but the size and shape of the package indicated that it was , indeed, a sari. The suspense was too much for me. I did not wait to drive home, but opened the package while in the car. Inside was a beautiful sari, with a note from this most gracious and generous man, wishing me a Happy Christmas and New Year! I cried and cried... such warm and joyful tears! This thoughtful gesture from someone half way across the world so deeply touched my soul, bringing warmth and light into the cold dark corners of my heart.

I will never forget this most memorable and meaningful gift and can only hope that my favorite sari walla knows how his kindness has brightened my holidays.

May the blessing of his generous spirit be returned to him a thousand fold!

My Favorite Sari Walla

Sari

2008-07-21T10:48:00.001-04:00

Aug 5, 2007 Lucille Iacovelli

Leaving my tiny flat is increasingly more difficult, as preparation to get out the door requires more breath and effort than I can muster these days. So I try very hard to make the most of times I am able to venture forth, precariously driving with one hand on the wheel and the other pressed to my throat, allowing me to breathe and lift my head enough to see where I am going.

After wrapping myself in a brilliant vintage sari from my treasured E-Bay sari-walla I headed for the library, where the librarian ladies vicariously enjoy my Indian garb while nibbling the home made treats I bring to them. It was a hot and sunny day when my old reliable 1990 Toyota overheated, forcing me to pull off the road and consult the user manual to see what I should do. After a struggle in raising the hood and finding the coolant chamber empty, I approached a woman working in her garden and asked if she would be so kind as to give me some water for my car. She looked surprised, then smiled radiantly and said "Oh! Your gown is beautiful!" The annoyance of my overheated engine eased as her pleasure in my sari lightened my concerns. I thanked her for the water, filled the coolant chamber and headed for the nearest garage.

I stopped at a place where I had done business in past weeks. The same man who attended me before was seated in his little enclosure. I got out of the car and once again battled with the hood, trying to quell the ever present angst at the reason for my physical limitations, hoping to get this car problem fixed with the least amount of effort possible.

I looked toward the enclosure to see if the man was heading out to assist me. He was not. He was sitting with his feet up on his little desk, hands behind his head, just watching me with a perverse smirk on his face. I waited and waited. He continued to sit and stare, until I finally walked towards his enclosure. Meanwhile, another man from the business next door must have seen me waiting and was headed toward the enclosure, perhaps thinking the garage man was unaware he had a customer. I stepped into the presence of these two men and the body language displayed by the garage man hit me like a slap in the face. He eyed me from bindi to sandals, taking in my "unconventional" (for Cape Cod) attire, with a look of pure contempt. I turned to the other man. His face was open and friendly, willing to help as he inquired about the overheating of my car. He seemed shamed by the garage man's behavior. This gracious man deftly handled the rather dangerous looking job of opening the radiator cap as a cloud of hot vapor escaped, then bubbled and gurgled as he filled the radiator with water and advised me on where I should go to have the car checked out thoroughly.

This garage was not even his business, yet he was kind enough to assist me and even refused to take my money when I tried to pay him. All this time, the garage man sat, watching with his vile smirk which transformed his rather nice features into an ugly visage. I have stopped at this garage several times in the past, and this man has always attended me with prompt courtesy when I was dressed in western clothes. I left that garage with half my heart sinking at the attitude of the garage man, and half lifted by the other's kindness.

What makes people react with contempt at the sight of something different? What would make a person so judgmental at the sight of a foreign garment as indisputably lovely as sari? I wish this man's bigoted attitude was a rare exception in the American character, but as I later went shopping for groceries and caught disconcerting looks from every direction, I fear this intolerance is more common than I care to ponder. This experience has not dampened my love for wearing saris. It has only strengthened my determination to adorn myself in them as often as possible.. for my own enjoyment and hopefully, to expose my narrow minded countrymen to the beauty of another culture.. As I look around and see virtually everyone dressed as if they are ready for a day of cutting the grass or pulling weeds in the garden, I know my sari momentarily enriches its immediate environment..a bright and beautiful gift from India.

Dhanyavaad, favored sari-walla. You brighten my days.

Namaste.

Lucille Iacovelli

Website of my favorite E-Bay sari-walla

My Special Visitor

2008-07-20T15:32:00.001-04:00

~August 11, 2007~
The light rain brought a flurry of activity to the tiny deck just outside my kitchen door. I had just replenished the nectar in a glass hummingbird feeder, scattered a few hands full of seed along the railing and floor, then filled a clay dish with a mixture of corn meal and peanut butter that sends the squirrels and chipmunks into paroxysms of delight. My friends were all waiting..perched in the oak branches forming a graceful, protective canopy over their miniature sanctuary. They began to alight even before I closed the screen behind me. Calling their friends to breakfast, they chirped and chattered, filling the morning with sparkling bird song. Blue jays, chickadees, goldfinch, sparrows, Mr. & Mrs Cardinal.. even the cranky crow made an appearance, but found the offered fare not to his liking..a relief to his smaller avian relations.

The squirrels arrived in flying leaps from tree trunk to deck, noisily announcing their presence with a commotion before settling down to feast. Reliable as clock work, Redhead and her boyfriend, Gray are bold and incorrigible, wreaking havoc with my potted plants when made to wait for their breakfast.

Then, as sudden as a flash, there she was..my special visitor. Her tiny body flitting from flower to feeder.. Her iridescent feathers luminous as jewels in the rain-gray morning. Yes, it was she.. hovering before me, looking me straight in the eye, I swear. She knows me. Does she remember?

Continued.. part II

My Special Visitor

2007

My Special Visitor - Part II

2008-07-20T15:28:00.000-04:00

~August 14, 2007~

My flat is small, but just right for me and my canine companion, a 13 yr old cocker spaniel I call Girlie. We live on the second floor of my landlord's garage, set far back from the main house. A wide glass door opens from my kitchen onto my private little "wildlife sanctuary" where bird feeders and a casual array of fragrant herbs and blossoms reside. Enchanting creatures of feather and fur are drawn out of their woodland habitat to this tiny space.

Lucille Iacovelli

To be continued...

My Special Visitor 2007

My Special Visitor - Part III

2008-07-20T15:26:00.001-04:00

August, 2007

Exhausted from the simple task of window washing, I went inside for a brief rest. As my labored breathing became more regular, my eyes closed on pleasant thoughts of sitting at my sparkling clean window with a nice cup of tea and enjoying the view. Just as this lovely image brought me to the edge of sleep, I heard a tiny thud on the glass.

My heart flew to my throat as I hurried to the door. The precious hummingbird lay motionless on the straw mat. She was on her back, eyes closed. Kneeling before the mat, I gently, reverently, placed her in my hands. I was overwhelmed by the intensity of an indescribable emotion as I held this nearly weightless, beautiful creature; her heart beating so fast as my own raced with it. My mind flew in a thousand directions at once. I heard my own voice cry "Please, God, do not let her die!" while simultaneously admonishing myself for cleaning the glass to invisibility.

I stood helpless, holding the helpless bird, my heart and soul filled to bursting with my pitiful prayer for her life. As tears streamed down my face, I vaguely recalled reading something about reviving stunned hummingbirds. With her tiny head held gently, ever so gently, between my thumb and two fingers, I dipped the end of her long, slender beak into the cone of the nectar bottle. Suddenly, her eyes opened as her unimaginably long tongue extended and reached for the nectar.

continued....

My Special Visitor 2007

My Special Visitor - Part lV

2008-07-20T15:24:00.000-04:00

(Photo: Visitor of a different feather..from the Finch family. I found this sweet bird on my deck during a brutal snow storm last winter, motionless and nearly frozen. I placed her inside my jacket, next to my heart, and left her there while I lined a box with an old tea towel, as my canine companion eyed me suspiciously. I then settled her into the box, covered it with a screen, then frantically searched for the number of the nearest wildlife sanctuary, thinking she would need professional help. After one hour, she was able to move, but only a bit. I fetched the camera while she nestled in my hand and captured this shot. From the moment the bird entered the flat, my dog excitedly paced back and forth in the tiny 2 rooms, giving me jealous glances, then sneaking an occasional jump, curious to see the creature that had stolen my attention. Finally, the little finch energetically fluttered her wings and appeared completely restored, I brought the box outside, removed the screen, and watched with relief, as she flew away as good as new.)

Lucille Iacovelli

Holding one of God's perfect creatures in one's hand is a blessing profound as life itself. As the hummingbird revived, I watched in awe while its tongue continued dipping into the nectar. I was overcome by an intensity of awareness at the wonder of this moment.. this blessing bestowed upon me and this breathtakingly exquisite little bird.

She allowed me the opportunity to see, up close, every magnificent detail of her body.. her tiny feet! ... her oh, so lovely and perfectly feathered little body!.. and her eyes, trusting and looking straight into mine with an awareness we, as human beings, will never know in our present bodies. The tiny bird blessed me with its trust and filled me with humility.

My Special Visitor 2007

My Special Visitor - Part V

2008-07-20T15:21:00.001-04:00

~September 3, 2007~

Each day, the call is conveyed in chirping and bird-song, amongst the woodland creatures:

"Hurry! The lady with the wild gray hair is serving breakfast! "

Lucille Iacovelli

2007

Tech Support, Indian Style

2008-07-20T15:18:00.000-04:00

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Yesterday I had occasion to contact Dell tech support online as my new printer/scanner was not working properly. What I thought might be an ordeal, turned out to be the highlight of my day. I was so impressed by the friendly manner of my Dell Representative, whose name was Shweta.

While we were waiting for files to download, I asked if Shweta was in Hyderbad, as I recalled reading in 'Planet India' that Hyderbad is known as the second Silicon Valley. As it turns out, Shweta was in Chandigarh. I mentioned that I was reading 'One Night @ the Call Center' and she replied that she also read this book and found it enjoyable. I responded that reading it gave me a better appreciation for the work she was doing in helping computer-ignorant Amerikans like myself ;-) She responded with a :) and said it was her pleasure to help me.

As we waited for a large file to download before she could install it to my computer, we had a lovely chat as she graciously answered my many questions about India and exchanged opinions about books and other topics until the file download was complete.

What could have remained a dull and silent interlude turned into a delightful interaction with this highly efficient, enormously courteous and friendly person half way across the planet. After Shweta solved my computer/printer problem, I was almost sad that our chat had to end. I was most pleased, however, when she asked if I would be willing to take an extra minute while she transferred me to her supervisor, who would like to know if there was anything she could have done better to serve my needs.

With great pleasure, I assured the supervisor that Shweta could not have done anything better as her assistance was perfect in every way. My computer problem turned out to be the most enjoyable part of my day. Thank you Shweta... Dell is lucky to have you!

Lucille Iacovelli

Return of the Cicadas

2008-07-20T15:12:00.000-04:00

Mother Nature has turned up the volume on my tinnitus to a nerve-wracking cacophony. The "Peridiocal Cicadas" known by entomologists as Brood XIV are emerging here on Cape Cod right on schedule. Every 17 years, these cicadas complete another life-cycle when nymphs buried under ground emerge to molt and mate in unimaginable numbers. They remain in the nymph stage for 17 years and because of this are considered the longest-lived of all insects.

I first witnessed this remarkable phenomena when I moved to Cape Cod in 1991. I awoke one day to a deafening noise. I opened my door to investigate the source of this racket. The shock! I thought I was still asleep and in the midst of a nightmare! There were *thousands* of these HUGE insects in various stages of shedding their armour-like shells, emerging into winged creatures of spectacular proportion and coloring. With their bulging red eyes contrasted against plump black bodies and veined transparent wings, their sheer number made the sight and SOUND surreal and unforgettable. I had never seen anything like this before (except in horror films.) Since earliest memory, I have had a "phobic" reaction to large insects. It has taken a conscious effort to bring this irrational fear reaction under control over the years. Gardening helped in this regard, and I learned to appreciate the uniqueness of the insect realm, but I confess there are some insects I still prefer to observe from afar, and the cicada is one of them.

After my cicada initiation in 1991, I forgot about them... until now. As I write, their unrelenting "singing", which will continue for another month, pervades my auditory sensation...akin to the nerve-grating scratching of fingernails on a chalk board, to a meditative-like white noise. The return of the cicadas mark my 17th year on Cape Cod, where flora and fauna give rise to endless fascination.

Lucille Iacovelli

Just for fun!

2008-07-20T14:56:00.000-04:00

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Bonomo

Click on the link above and begin "fancy doodling". Whether you use it as a creative tool or simply for fun, this program can become addictive! Best to set a stop-time alarm if you are unable to tear yourself away from your computer.
(Note: Bonomo will NOT work with Internet Explorer. At present, only users of Foxfire, Opera and Safari are able to enjoy using this online application)

I recently started using Foxfire and find it faster than IE. Actually, I use both.. some online applications work better with one than the other. You can download Opera, Safari and Firefox for free. Firefox also has versions in Gujarati ગુજરાતી and Punjabi ਪੰਜਾਬੀ

You can save your masterpiece as a .jpg or screencapture it and save it in other image formats.

Bomono is by Phillip Lenssen, the blogger/owner of Google Blogoscoped. He is seeking submissions of bomono works of art. Once you have finished your piece, just click on the @ sign button in the bottom corner to send your work to him.

Help Free Greenpeace Activists

2008-07-20T14:54:00.000-04:00

Help Free Greenpeace Activists

Japanese police have arrested two Greenpeace activists for exposing a whale meat scandal involving the government- sponsored whaling program. The two activists, Junichi Sato, 31, and Toru Suzuki, 41, are being investigated for allegedly stealing a box of whale meat which they presented as evidence. Sign the petition

A Special Kind of Medicine

2008-07-20T14:45:00.001-04:00

Almost a decade ago, I had a negative experience with cosmetic facial surgery. I was left with serious functional disorders which effect breathing, swallowing and ability to lift my head and close my jaw. I will not go into the clinical details, for that is not what this story is about. However, to clarify what follows, it is fair to say that I was blacklisted by the most competent surgeons here in the US after going public with my story. There were a few truly compassionate doctors who tried their best to help me, but not being plastic surgeons themselves, their hands were tied to a great extent.

One of these doctors is my primary care physician. She is from India, and I could not hope for a more highly skilled, kind and compassionate doctor. I had the good fortune to become her patient when she first arrived on Cape Cod, as patients gravitated to her practice like bees to blossoms. As her patients became numerous, she was forced to refer newcomers to her colleagues. As my primary care physician, my situation has been deeply frustrating to us both, as she does everything within her realm of specialty to see that I receive every possible diagnostic that might help a surgeon work out a method of corrective surgery that may improve my situation. However, in today's medical system, particularly in the realm of cosmetic plastic surgery where surgeons' egos tend to expand to phenomenal proportions and practitioners remain behind the 'White Wall of Silence', patients with iatrogenic injuries often become the untouchables of the patient population, unable to find a surgeon willing to treat them.

As my condition disabled me to the point where surviving every 24 hours has become a toss of fate and I struggle to accomplish the most basic tasks to maintain independence, I begged a highly skillful surgeon I had consulted in the past to see me again for reevaluation. This required months of e-mail communication, and I am certain he agreed to see me against the advice of his colleagues, who warned him against any involvement with my case.

After an appointment date was set, I was scheduled to see my primary care physician. I felt very hopeful on this day. My heart felt lighter than it had for years, and I looked forward to telling my doctor about this long awaited breakthrough. This was the first glimmer of hope in years of an otherwise gloomy state of existence. I am rarely able to leave my flat these days, and my monthly visit to my doctor is understandably frustrating for us both as my condition worsens with no available help in sight. I am acutely aware that my situation has made my doctor feel helpless, and my heart aches for her because she is so sensitively attuned to her patients' needs.

On this day, however, I knew our visit would be brighter than she could know. I decided to mark the occasion by wearing a lovely muted gray-green sari in honor of her homeland, India, a country I have always longed to see. I usually dress very simply and plainly these days, as adornment is low on the list of priorities when managing to do needful things requires all the energy I can muster. But this was a day worthy of a special effort. As I draped my sari that morning, I worried, just for a moment, that it would not be done properly to her eyes! However, I am used to wearing a sari, which I believe is the perfect garment for every woman, versatile as well as beautiful and suitable for every occasion. My doctor's eyes lit up when I walked into her examining room in my sari. When I told her about the appointment with the surgeon, the room filled with hope.. my hope of possibly being restored to live a normal life, and her hope for my well being.

She then began the practical part of her exemplary doctoring and gently but firmly reminded me of the risks of surgery and the possibility that things might get worse. She wanted me to think about this decision very carefully. We discussed the status of my health, and she again expressed her happiness about my upcoming appointment with the surgeon.

Then she said something that will stay with me forever. My heart fills with great emotion and my eyes fill with tears as I recall this moment. She pressed her hands together in Namaste and said "I will pray for you". I do not know if this beautiful expression of faith and hope is often spoken by Indian doctors to their patients, but this is the first time a doctor ever said these words to me. I was overwhelmed with her heartfelt expression. Her words and compassion went straight from her heart to mine and will remain with me always. I have had the good fortune to be a patient of doctors who expressed true compassion and a deep desire for my well being, but never has a doctor said they would pray for me, though I believe some of them have done so. Hearing these words spoken with such openness and sincerity is truly a very special kind of medicine. Prayer...A treatment to last a lifetime.

On my way out of her office she turned to me and said "Thank you for wearing the sari". I left there with my heart so full! I said my own prayer then, for my exceptional doctor's life to be filled with blessings always.

The Wild Turkey Families of Shawme-Crowell State Forest

2008-07-20T14:40:00.002-04:00

Wild Turkey Families

Lucille Iacovelli

Please excuse this post! Silly, I know, but still cannot not resist. (Yes, I love this tune Mera Naam Chin Chin Choo : )

Watch the video

~ Lucille Iacovelli

Time

2008-07-20T14:37:00.000-04:00

Time

I find myself in an incomprehensible position... a situation real enough to kill me, should I lose my balance on a fraying tightrope. Yet so surreal I sometimes think my death will be nothing more than an instantaneous vaporization of the molecules I call my body.
I am dying... we are all dying.

For most of us, living life prevails over the ever present pull of entropy.
This is as it should be. We are born to experience life to its fullest until our death. But like breathing, it is that space between the breaths which sets the tone for what follows.

I do not fear death, nor do I invite it.

I reside in a world full of high tech medical miracles and doctors who perform them. It is, therefore, inconceivable that amidst these doctors and their state-of-the-art 3D scanners capable of turning the human body with its every secret and function inside out to see how things work or might be fixed when they don't, that the simple mechanics of what is killing me remains a mystery.

I am dying in real-time,
begging at the same-time,
to be fixed, or at least, that an attempt be made,
before there is no-time.

Doctors.. made of special stuff, or so we think.
Different from us.
Different from each other.
Different.

~ Lucille Iacovelli